He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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