they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
