Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Just invented taco cereal.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
