good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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