Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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