Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
