my room smells like sperm. sweet.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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