Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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