It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
im calling her cock vulture from now on
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
