Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
My cat gives me a boner
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
