You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
