Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
