what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
