Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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