I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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