i jhust puked up my retainher.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
