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I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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