she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
