thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
