So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
