Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize
