how can u be prego again
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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