she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
