New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Randomize