you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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