Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Randomize
