ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
