even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Randomize
