So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
