I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
