Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
oh god was she eating orange peels again
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Randomize
