i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
