So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
