We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize