Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
