so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
