girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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