And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
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