I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
