My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
