you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
it glows. i had to have it.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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