I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
