remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
