i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
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