Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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