I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
