so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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