I don't usually arrange sex via text message
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
