I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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