There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
